


Safe and Suburban

by MutantsandSoldiers



Series: Spideypool Bingo 2020 [7]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Alternate Universe - Suburbs, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Assassins & Hitmen, Broken Bones, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dirty Talk, Drama, Home Alone Inspired Shenanigans, Insecure Wade Wilson, Kissing, M/M, Mercenary Wade Wilson, Minor Violence, Neighbors, Porn With Plot, Scientist Peter Parker, Suburbia, Switch Wade Wilson, switch peter parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:48:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25692319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MutantsandSoldiers/pseuds/MutantsandSoldiers
Summary: Peter just bought a house in a very nice suburban neighborhood. His neighbor is a bit of a recluse but that doesn't deter the scientist from making friends with the solitary man. A new house, new friend, safe neighborhood...what could go wrong?
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson
Series: Spideypool Bingo 2020 [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1811278
Comments: 7
Kudos: 274
Collections: Spideypool Bingo 2020 Round 2





	Safe and Suburban

**Author's Note:**

> Spideypool Bingo Fill:  
> ~ Suburbs AU ~

Peter stood in front of his new house beaming. 

It was a nice, quaint Victorian style pale blue house with three bedrooms and two bathrooms. The side that faced the road had a small covered porch with a few rocking chairs he had bought specifically for that purpose. He was standing in a small front yard with flowers lining the walkway up to the stairs. 

He felt so happy in that moment. Turning around, he quickly took out his phone and snapped a picture of himself with the house in the background. Peter couldn’t help but post it on his social media page before heading back to his car to grab some more boxes. 

Pulling a box out of his small car, he jumped a little when someone spoke. “Welcome, neighbor!” 

Peter caught the box before it could fall. “H-Hi there!” he smiled, finding a woman standing on the sidewalk with her small dog on a leash. 

“Just moving in?” the woman asked, brushing some hair out of her face and behind her ear. 

He looked down at the box in his hand thinking, duh. “Yeah, I just started today actually! I’m Peter,” he said, offering a hand. 

“Felicia, the Vice President of the HOA, it’s a pleasure to meet you!” she replied, placing her limp hand into his. It was awkward to shake but he did his best. “I live on the right side of you in the white house.” 

Peter shifted the box in his hands to even out the weight. “Oh, that’s cool! Well, let me go ahead and get this inside. It was nice meeting you Felicia!” he said, walking towards the house. 

“Peter,” she called out to him when he was about halfway to his house. He closed his eyes in exasperation but had a smile on his face when he turned around. “Word to the wise, your left side neighbor is a little...eccentric. It’s best if you just stay away from him.” 

The young man looked over at the house curiously. It was olive colored that was very well kept with a pristine lawn, beautiful garden of exotic flowers in the front and black curtains in the windows. All in all, it looked like a regular house that was well loved. 

“O-Okay, thanks for the warning,” he nodded, turning around and hurrying into the house before she could say anything else. He sighed when he finally put the box down on the ground in the living room. The only furniture he had had the chance of delivering was his mattress, which he had to strap to the roof of his car just to get it here. He was renting a UHaul in two days to get the rest of his furniture here. 

The only problem? Getting it all inside. He could call Harry but his best friend was always so busy being the CEO of Oscorp. Maybe he could bribe him with pizza and beer. 

Either way, he needed to get the furniture inside. He shot a quick text to Harry, Gwen and Mary Jane before heading back outside to the car. The few boxes in the car were mostly kitchen stuff, the food from his refrigerator and work stuff. 

He was grabbing the last box when a bright, cherry red sports car drove down the road past him. It pulled into the driveway of the olive colored house to his left. Peter was curious so walked slowly to the house so he could see the person get out of the car. 

Sadly, the car pulled into the garage. Damn, he was hoping to see what Felisia meant by eccentric. Oh well, he’d have to go meet the guy later. 

It was odd that the guy was getting _back_ home at eight in the morning. Maybe he was like Peter and kept odd hours at work? Whatever, it wasn’t good to be nosy with the neighbors like that. 

Peter quickly unpacked his boxes and made some lunch. He didn’t have to go back to work for a few more days, thankfully, so he’d have to fix his sleep schedule. He decided to go grab another round of boxes from his apartment. 

The apartment was about an hour away in the shittiest part of the city, which was a big reason why Peter chose the suburbs to settle. Sure, he was only twenty-five and wasn’t married but that didn’t mean he couldn’t own a house. His job at Oscorp paid really well and he was ready to actually have something for himself. 

When he got back, it was about six in the afternoon. He was placing a box on the kitchen table when some movement caught his eye. Looking out the window above the sink, he smiled when he spotted his neighbor in the olive house. He had his back to Peter but was on his knees in front of a garden. There were gloves on his hands and he had the hood of his black jacket up over his head. 

Peter decided he should go over there and say something. He walked out onto his back porch that led to the large backyard. There was a chest-high wooden fence separating their yards so Peter walked over. 

“Hi there,” he said politely, seeing the man’s shoulders tense a little. “I just moved in. I’m Peter.” 

The man turned his head only slightly almost as if to keep his face hidden behind the hoodie. “Wow, those old geezers finally left, huh?” was his curt response. 

Peter’s face dropped a little when he realized the guy was a little stand-offish. “Uh, yeah they decided to travel so they sold it to me,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. 

The man grunted, standing up in such a fluid motion that it startled Peter. “Good, they were assholes,” he nods, never looking at Peter as he headed for his house. “I’m Wade. I’ve got to get ready for work.” 

He disappeared into the back of his house without another word. Peter felt a little conflicted as he stood there, working his jaw. Man, that guy was kind of rude. 

Looking down, Peter realized the man had been weeding a small patch of vegetables. Wade must really like gardening, he thought idly. There were also fruit trees lining the fence at the back of the house that lined another person’s yard. “Lemon, apple, orange and something else,” he muttered to himself, looking down the trees with a smile. “Huh, that’s cool.” 

Peter went back inside. Truthfully, he had a hard time believing someone who loved plants so much could be so rude. He decided that he would try again tomorrow to make friends. Maybe Wade was just shy. 

The young man worked the next morning to get the rest of his boxes from his apartment to his new home. If he had anything left then he could just put it in the UHaul. He closed his trunk just as he caught sight of Felicia coming down the sidewalk. 

He smiled pleasantly, setting the two bags down on the ground so he could focus on her. “Good morning, Felicia,” he said as she stopped just a few feet away from him. 

“Good morning, Peter!” she exclaimed far too brightly for this time in the morning. “How’s moving in going?” 

Peter shrugged. “As well as can be expected. I’m moving furniture tomorrow and I should be done,” he explained, leaning against the car. 

“If you join the HOA, we have a moving program that could help,” she was pointing out just as Peter saw the bright red car pass them. Felicia’s nose scrunched up as if she had just caught a whiff of something putrid. She had the decency to wait until the garage door closed before scoffing. “I would _hate_ living next to that creep.” 

He wasn’t sure, but that made him feel bad. “He doesn’t seem so bad,” he defended the guy who had literally blown him off yesterday. “He has a beautiful garden behind his house.” 

Felicia rolled her eyes like she wasn’t a middle-aged woman. “Oh please, that doesn’t make up for the fact that he’s a creep,” she said in a very rude tone. “He stays out all night and sleeps during the day. I’ve heard he has a huge arsenal in his house too.” 

Peter wasn’t interested in gossiping with this woman anymore so he quickly grabbed his bags. “Well, I’ve got to get going so I can finish unpacking. It was nice talking to you again, Felicia,” he said with a strained smile before walking away. 

“Don’t forget about joining the HOA!” Felicia called after him in a chipper tone. 

He worked hard the rest of the day to get everything in his house and situated. He had grabbed a few things of furniture that he would be able to fit into his car too. It wasn’t until he finally finished that he remembered he wanted to try again with Wade. 

Humming happily, he put together some of his famous chimichangas together and some hand squeezed lemonade. He danced around the huge kitchen happily, checking out the window every now and then. It seemed the man had good timing because it was right when the timer dinged that Peter saw the dark figure crouched in the grass. 

Peter put two of the chimichangas in a large tupperware case with a lid and a glass of the lemonade. He walked outside, hopping off of his deck to walk over to the fence. “Hey there neighbor!” he said happily, seeing the man’s back tense again. “I know you’re about to go off to work but I figured you might want something to eat?” 

The man doesn’t turn around but sits back on his feet. “Didn’t Felicia tell you to stay away from me?” he asked, voice low and almost dangerous. It made Peter perk up. “I saw you talking with her this mornin’.” 

The young man scoffed. “Please, I’ll make my own judgments about my neighbors.” 

There was a pause as the man’s head turned just a little. “What did you make?” he sighed, surrendering. 

“Only my famous chimichangas and some lemonade if you’re thirsty,” Peter smiled brightly, feeling like he was getting somewhere. 

“I’m off tonight,” Wade said as he stood up. “Want to sit at the table and eat together?” 

He was pointing with his gloved hand at a small outdoor table with an umbrella and chairs. Peter hadn’t noticed it until now. “Sure, I'll plate these up! Take the lemonade,” he excitedly explained, passing the glass over to Wade before running back into the house. He hadn’t expected the man to actually invite him over but...Peter would be lying if he said he wasn’t excited. 

It wasn’t a few minutes later that he went back to the fence where Wade was standing with his back against the wood. He perked up and turned around to actually face Peter for the very first time. Peter was so excited to hand over the plates, he paused when he finally looked at the man. 

Wade’s face was a mess of scars and pockmarks. The man’s brown eyes looked away, embarrassed but Peter merely smiled. “Here, hold these,” he said, offering the plates over the stuff. He took a few steps back and ran so he could place his hands on the top of the fence and leap over. “Ready!” 

Wade’s eyes were a little wide as he looked on in surprise. “That was pretty good, kid,” he chuckled, half of his mouth perking up in a grin. Peter got caught in the way it lit the man’s otherwise scary face up. “Come on, let’s eat.” 

They sat down at the table with their food and started eating. Peter talked for a bit about moving and the house while Wade ate in silence. He had a feeling the man was holding back. The younger man had the sudden urge to bring him out of his shell. 

“So, Wade, what do you do on your days off?” he asked, smiling at the man who looked up from under the hood. He seemed kind of shocked that Peter had asked about him at all. 

He looked out at his backyard. “I tend to my garden quite a bit but I’ll probably play some video games too,” he explained, taking a large bite of his food. “This is amazing, by the way.” 

Peter felt a little heat creep into his cheeks at the compliment. “Thanks, it’s just something I picked up from my Aunt May!” he laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“You said you’re about done with moving your stuff?” Wade asked, taking a sip of his lemonade. It was so odd seeing the tall, very obviously buff man drinking such a sugary drink. Peter couldn’t help but notice the way the man filled out his black jacket, the sleeves stretching just a bit to contain strong arms, and his jeans were far too tight. 

He smiled as he put his fork down on his empty plate. “Yeah, I just got some furniture to move tomorrow,” he said, leaning back in the comfortable chair. “I was thinking about joining the HOA just to have the moving perk.” 

It was small but Peter noticed the way the man’s eye twitched a little. “Don’t join the HOA.” 

Peter looked up at him, surprised. “Why?” 

He shook his head, looking towards Felicia’s backyard. “They’ve got all these strict rules about how you should keep your house, lawn, mailbox...shit, they’ll fine your ass and be completely within their rights even if it’s because your curtain color isn’t _per the bylaws_ ,” he explained with disgust in his voice. “It’s not required to join the HOA in this state and I’d highly advise against it, Peter.” 

The young man blinked a few times before nodding. “That’s good advice. Thanks, Wade,” he smiled brightly. 

Wade looked at him for a second before looking away. There was a moment of silence between the two of them where they just sat listening to the sounds of birds and kids playing in the distance. There were some bird feeders hanging on a tall rod away from the garden; Peter was pretty sure he saw a hummingbird flit by a second ago. 

“You said you were going to play video games,” Peter started, catching the man’s attention. “I just put my computer back together this morning. What kind of games do you play? Maybe we could play together.” 

Wade mulled something in his head before letting a small smile show. “Sure, that sounds nice,” he said. 

They talked about video games for a bit. It turned out that they had quite a few online games in common so they exchanged Discord information. It was starting to get dark before either one of them realized it. 

“I’d better get these cleaned,” Peter smiled, standing up to reach for Wade’s plate. Wade was reaching for it, probably to hand it to him, and their fingers brushed softly. It felt like electricity as their skin touched, sending a zing of excitement through Peter. “Oh, sorry!” 

“No my bad,” Wade said, pulling his hand back. Peter hadn’t even realized the man had taken his weeding gloves off but he could see his hands were just as scarred as his face. 

They looked at each other for a few seconds before Peter broke eye contact first to stack the dishes. “Thanks for eating with me, Wade,” he whispered, feeling a little embarrassed by his reaction. They had just touched hands. What the fuck was wrong with him? “It’s nice having someone to talk to.” 

Wade shoved his hands into his pockets, slouching a little from his tall height. “Yeah, thanks for the food. It was great. Let’s…” he paused for a second before just deciding to go for it. “Let’s do it again sometime.” 

Peter’s face beamed. “Yeah, I’d like that!” 

“Next time I’ll cook,” Wade offered quickly, corner of his lips lifting in a small grin. 

The young man nodded his head enthusiastically. “Sure, that sounds great!” he chuckled, juggling the dishes. “I’ll get these cleaned up and hop on Discord, okay?” 

Wade nodded, turning to head for the backdoor. 

The young man went around to the front of the man’s house, opting to not jump over the fence with dishes in his hands, and cleaned them up. He quickly got on Discord and added his neighbor so they could game together. 

He typed in the man’s username: Deadpool. Peter added him on and hit the call button. 

“What’s up, Spiderman?” the man asked, obviously teasing him on his username. His voice surprised Peter, he sounded way different over Discord than he did in real life. 

“Hey, Deadpool,” he teased back, adjusting his headphones. “What are we playing?” 

Wade was completely different online than he was off. He was loud, boisterous and talked _a lot_. Peter never would have guessed this was the same person had they just randomly met in a game. 

“Whose balls did _you_ have to fondle to get this high of a level, moron!” Wade shouted through the mic as they played through a game of League. “I hope you wore your brown pants!” 

Peter found himself cracking up for almost the entire game as Wade just kept going. He liked this side of his neighbor and kind of wished the guy didn’t feel like he couldn’t be himself around Peter. Not that he blamed the poor guy. With all of those scars, it was obviously hard for him to get to know people without them making assumptions. Add to that his wild and crazy personality? 

The young man frowned as he thought about the way Felicia talked about Wade. From now on, he wouldn’t let anyone talk about him like that. Wade was his friend from here on out, which meant Peter would defend him from assholes. 

They spent the next several hours playing several different games until around 1 in the morning before Peter had to call it quits. He got ready for bed with a smile on his face. He had made a new friend, which, truthfully, coming from the mind of a twenty-five year old guy was kind of pathetic. But still, he was excited about his new friendship. 

He woke up the next morning super sleepy but ready to get the last part of his moving done and over with. He was on autopilot as he grabbed the UHaul and made it over to his old apartment. He arrived to see Harry’s car parked right out front. 

“Wow, I’m shocked you found time to come help!” Peter laughed, walking over to his best friend to wrap his arms around him in a tight hug. 

“Hey, man don’t be like that!” Harry chuckled, gesturing with his head to the apartment. “Let’s get this over with. I want to see your new digs!” 

They got the furniture loaded up in record time and back to Peter’s new house by lunch time. Harry gave an impressed whistle when he saw the house. “Man, this is nice!” he smiled, jerking his head down when his phone started ringing. Based on the way his face fell, Peter knew, without a doubt, that it was his dad. “Yeah? No I was out-dad if you’d just let me...okay.” 

Peter winced a little. “Got to go?” 

Harry gave a heavy sigh. “Sorry, Pete, you going to be okay?” 

The young man gave his friend a big hug and a smile. “I’ll manage. If not, you’ll just have to swing by after work and help,” he chuckled, waving as his best friend got into the car and left. 

Looking at the UHaul, Peter huffed out a sigh. What was he going to do now? He resigned himself to just grabbing what he could on his own and leaving the rest until someone could help. Climbing up into the bed of the truck, he grabbed hold of the small bookshelf and started pulling. It slipped across the floor slowly until he got to the edge. 

“Woah!” he yelped, feeling himself tumbling backwards when his hands slipped off the shelf. He closed his eyes tightly, holding the back of his head in anticipation of the impact. Instead, he felt himself fall into the cradle of someone’s strong arms with a grunt. 

He opened his eyes and gasped. “Hey, Spidey,” Wade said with an amused smirk on his face. “I don’t mean to alarm you but...I think you just fell for me!” 

Peter’s heart hammered in his chest but that didn’t stop him from falling into a peel of laughter. “You think you’re funny, Wade?” he giggled with the shake of his head. It took him a second to realize he was still gently cradled in the man’s incredibly muscular arms. “I think you can put me down now.” 

Wade shrugged his shoulders and gently set Peter’s feet to the ground. “You look like you need some help,” he points out, looking inside the bed of the truck. “Your friend duck on you?” 

The younger man’s face warmed a little. “No, Harry is just busy being the CEO of Oscorp. He was needed back at work,” he explained, words jumbling together when the man hopped up into the bed of the truck. His ass was right at Peter’s eye level and the younger man was _fixated_. He had a great ass and those jeans were doing _nothing_ to hide how tone it was. 

“You should have come get me,” Wade said, looking at the other man as he pushed the bookshelf from the other side. 

Peter grabbed the other side and gently guided it backwards so the man could climb out of the truck. “I thought you would be asleep,” he admitted, embarrassed. 

Wade gave him an incredulous look. “Peter, don’t do dangerous shit without me! It makes me jealous!” he laughed, hardly even breathing hard as they carried the bookshelf up into the house. 

They worked for a good few hours before both flopping down on the couch. Peter was sweaty and his muscles hurt like fucking hell but...looking at Wade, you would have thought they just played a rousing game of golf. He pulled his hood back so he could run the bottom of his hoodie across his face. 

Peter smiled. He was a little giddy that the man felt comfortable enough to pull that damn hood down around him. The taller man had scars all over his head, even his ears, but as Peter looked at him...he didn’t care. 

Wade must have felt him staring because he looked over. “You good?” he asked, sounding a little nervous. 

The young man flushed a little but nodded. “Yeah, I’m good. I’ve got to get the truck back.” 

Reaching into his pocket, Wade pulled out a set of keys. “Well, you lead the way and I’ll drive you back. Let’s get some dinner; I’m hungrier than a whore during a dry spell.” 

Peter laughed, shaking his head as they walked outside. “That doesn’t even make sense, Wade!” 

“Maybe when you’re older, Spideyboy!” he said, making a kissy face before disappearing into his garage. 

Handing the keys of the UHaul to the guy at the desk, he finished up and walked outside. Wade was leaning against the side of his cherry red sports car, looking at his phone. He had his hood up but Peter really couldn’t blame him. The poor guy must get a lot of unwanted attention looking the way he did. 

“Hop in,” Wade said without looking up from his phone. 

Peter had to admit that he was way too excited to ride in the guy’s sports car. He buckled up with a little bounce. “Oh man, I’ve wanted this since I first saw your car!” he gushes, opening the door so he could slide into the seat. 

“Yeah?” he perked up, settling in his own seat and turning on the car. It roared to life with avengence. “How about you order pizza for delivery and we’ll take the backroads so I can show you what this baby is made of?” 

The younger man’s face lit up with excitement. “Yeah? Okay!” 

He quickly put in an order for pizza on his phone just as Wade pulled out of the city and headed down a backroad. Peter had never been on the backroads of his particular area but they were a lot curvier than he anticipated. Even with that, he was having the time of his life as Wade swerved around corners at breakneck speed without fear. 

“Faster!” he laughed as he was shoved to the door on a particularly sharp curve. 

“You got it, baby boy,” Wade smirked, gunning the engine as they came up over a hill. They literally got air, which made Peter’s stomach jump straight to his throat and then plummet. 

Too soon, they came into familiar looking territory and had to slow down. He pulled into the driveway just before a delivery car pulled up in front of Peter’s house. The car stopped so he could get out then pulled into the garage. 

Grabbing the pizza from the guy and tipping him, Peter practically skipped over to Wade’s house just as the door opened. The man had his hood down now as he stepped aside to allow Peter into the house. It was decorated in a masculine style, dark woods, earthy tones and there was even a fireplace on one side of the living room. 

Wade closed the door behind them, grabbing the pizza box to place on the living room table. He stole a piece so he could flop back on his leather couch with his boots up on the table. “Come sit,” he said through a mouthful of food. 

Peter smiled, sitting an appropriate distance from the man to nibble on his pizza. The large TV in front of them turned on when Wade grabbed the remote. The vulgar sounds of people having sex filled the room as the image of two men very obviously going at it popped onto the screen. 

Wade laughed loudly, leaning his head back before clicking away with the remote. “Whoops, sorry about that, Spidey! Forgot to change the channel before bed!” he smirked, looking at the young man who was very obviously flushed and slightly embarrassed. This only made Wade laugh harder, curling his arms around his middle. 

Peter smacked the man’s arm with the back of his hand playfully. “Don’t laugh at me, you perv! Who just _leaves_ porn on their living room TV?!” he snapped, though weakly, as the man’s laughter started to rub off on him. He was having a really hard time not joining and, eventually, gave up his pitiful glare. 

The taller man’s hand came out to push Peter lightly in response. “I don’t usually have too many visitors to worry about!” he giggled, pointing with the remote to the gaming console under the TV in the entertainment center. “You want to Smash?” 

Peter’s laughter stopped as he looked over at the man to see him grinning mischievously. “You’re such a pervert, Wade!” the young man laughed, shaking his head. “Sure, I’ll play _Smash Brothers_.” 

And that’s what they did for the next couple of hours. 

Truth be told, Peter was having the time of his life. He missed the times when he had done this stuff with Harry; he was far too busy to come out and play Smash Brothers very often anymore. Laughing and bantering with Wade felt like he was actually enjoying his life instead of just going to work, coming home, sleeping and doing it all over again. 

“Oh no, absolutely not!” Wade screamed, leaning over until their shoulders touched. “No, no!” Without taking his hands off his controller, he wrapped his arms around Peter’s neck. 

“Wade, that’s cheating!” Peter yelped, having a hard time not laughing as the man’s cheek pressed against the side of his head. “I’m still going to win you asshole!” 

It came down to a wire but soon, the winner was decided, and Peter threw his arms up in trump. “No!” Wade groaned, leaning completely on the smaller man in defeat. “I demand a rematch. You cheated.” 

Peter scoffed, “ _I_ cheated?! You grabbed me by the head!” 

They both paused when Peter turned his head and they found their faces just centimeters away from each other. Wade was still slouching on him but didn’t seem in too much of a hurry to pull away from his position. Peter’s eyes were suddenly drawn to the man’s lips though he wasn’t sure why for a moment. 

His face flushed brightly. “Wade?” he asked, unsure of where this interaction was going. 

They both jumped when the phone in Peter’s pocket started ringing loudly. Wade sat back in his spot, taking another piece of pizza. Peter grabbed the phone with shaky hands. “Oh shit, it’s Harry,” Peter mumbled, not sure if he should be happy or upset that whatever had almost happened was now gone. “Hey dude, what’s up?” 

“Peter, you’re car’s here but I’ve rang the doorbell multiple times. Where are you?” Harry asked, obviously sounding a little confused. Peter never understood why Harry expected him to be ready at a moment’s notice but the same courtesy wasn’t extended to Peter. 

“Oh hell, sorry, I’m at my neighbor’s house. I’ll head right over!” Peter said, hanging up the phone and looking over at Wade apologetically. “I’m sorry, Harry’s at my house. I have to go.” 

Wade was lounged back on the far corner of the sofa looking far too comfortable. “It’s all good, Spidey. Go be with your friend. You want to take the pizza with you?” he asked, quirking a bald eyebrow curiously. 

There was a strange tumbling of his stomach as he looked at the strong, confident man lounging on his couch. He had an urge...one that he had never had before with another guy but...he couldn’t do that. It would make things weird, right? 

“Uh, no that’s fine, Wade! You have the rest!” he smiled, shoving his phone into his pocket. He walked to the door but paused, looking back. “This was fun...let’s do it again, sometime, yeah?” 

Wade’s face brightened with that stupid grin. “Totes my goats, Petey!” 

Peter felt good as he looked away and headed out the door. He had that giddy, bubbly feeling in his gut that he hadn’t felt in a long time. He was practically skipping when he spotted Harry at his door. 

“Sorry about that, I was playing Smash Brothers with Wade,” Peter smiled, unlocking his door so that he could let his friend inside. “You hungry? I’ve got some leftovers-” 

Harry interrupted him. “You know your neighbor is a hired gun, right?” 

Peter stopped dead in his tracks. There were a lot of things that went through his mind but it didn’t settle on the fact that Wade was dangerous or that he had never actually told him what he did...no, it landed on something else. Something that had been a bad habit of Harry’s for quite some time. 

“Harry, are you looking up my neighbors again?” he asked, voice devoid of emotions. Harry’s eyes widened for a second before he shoved his hands in his pockets and slouched. “We talked about this, dude. I don’t want you looking up the people that I associate with.” 

Harry ran his hand through his dark hair. “Dude, I’m just looking out for you. He looked sketchy as fuck.” 

Anger, hot and potent, coursed through him as he walked past Harry to the door. He opened it and stood by it with his arms crossed. “Get out of my house,” he said without hesitation or room for argument. Harry opened his mouth to say something but Peter cut him off. “ **Now**.” 

His friend deflated, slumping forward but obliged. He turned just outside Peter’s door as if to say something but the door was promptly closed in his face. Peter didn’t want to hear anything that the douche had to say at that moment. 

How _dare_ he talk about Wade like that. The guy who had obviously been horrifically scarred in some terrible situation; the guy who had helped him carry all of that fucking furniture into his house; the guy who had helped him even when he didn’t have to; and the guy who had just spent hours playing games with him. The guy Peter almost kissed… 

His face was suddenly hot as he thought about their moment on the couch. Was...was that what was about to happen? Were they about to kiss? Would he care? Did he want that? 

Peter felt conflicted as his mind went to the TV. It had very obviously been gay porn. Was that a sign from Wade? Was he trying to hint that he swung that way? They had only known each other for a few days. It was too soon for any of that, right? 

Looking at the clock, the young man winced when he realized what time it was. He had to get his sleep schedule back together; he was going back to work tomorrow night. That meant he had to stay up all night and sleep during the day. 

He sat down at his computer and pulled up Discord. Deadpool was online, from what it said. He chewed on his bottom lip for a second before sighing and calling the man. 

_“Hey, Spidey, your friend leave already?”_

Peter swallowed thickly when he realized how much his friend’s voice made him relax at that moment. He pressed the button to talk. “Yeah, he was being a real dickhead,” he sighed, leaning his elbows on his desk and hiding his face in his hands. 

Wade was quiet for a second before he said, _“About what?”_

There was a moment that he thought about lying but...not to Wade. The guy was probably the most blunt person he had ever met. “He warned me not to trust you because he had run a background check.” 

_“Shit, Peter, I’m sorry. I should have told you before…”_

Peter shook his head as if the man could see him through the computer. “No, you shouldn’t be sorry. You have no obligation to tell me anything about your personal life, Wade,” he said with a small smile. “Harry’s just a really jealous friend. We’ve talked about this before.” 

There was a quiet pause again. _“You know, you can ask me anything, right?”_

“I know, Wade, but that doesn’t mean I have a right to. We’ve only known each other a few days. You can tell me whatever you want, whenever you’re ready,” Peter said softly. “I made him go because he said you looked sketchy and that pissed me off. I’m tired of people judging you just because of the way you look, man. You’re one of the nicest people I’ve met so far and I like hanging out with you. Harry’s not going to change that because he found out what you do for a living. You could be hooking on some corner and I wouldn’t give a shit, Wade.” 

He was rambling, he _knew_ he was rambling, but he couldn’t stop once he had started. He wanted the man to know what he thought; he wanted the man to know that he supported and defended him. No one was going to bad mouth Wade while Peter was alive and could talk. 

There was a long silence that had Peter feeling a little nervous. He couldn’t read the man’s face when he couldn’t see it. Shit, what if he had said too much? What if he’d offended the guy? 

He heard the mic click on. 

_“I would look damn good in fishnets on a corner.”_

Peter had never laughed so hard in his life than he did when Wade was being...well, Wade. “Yeah, you would!” he got out in between snorts. 

It took a bit before the two of them stopped laughing. _“For serious though, thanks, Spidey,”_ Wade said after a second. _“It’s good to know that you have my back.”_

The younger man smiled gently. “Always, dude, now let’s play some Divinity. I’m headed back to work tomorrow night so I’ve got to get my sleep schedule back in line. You gonna stay up with me?” 

_“Hell yeah,”_ Wade laughed. _“I didn’t know you worked night shifts.”_

Peter loaded up Divinity. “Yeah, I’m a scientist at Oscorp. I work with spiders, hence my Discord name.” 

_“That’s fucking rad!”_ Wade nearly shouted. _“So you just play with different kinds of spiders all day?”_

The younger man laughed brightly. “No, not really. I’m in charge of taking their poison and creating different kinds of medicines and vaccines.” 

_“You ever get bit?”_

The conversation while they played went smoothly as Peter explained what he did for a living. Wade seemed super interested, which was odd because most people cringed away from the subject of spiders. Truthfully, Peter didn’t mind the spiders; they were calm, docile creatures for the most part. 

They only stopped when the sun started coming up. Peter yawned as he made his way towards his bedroom. It was nice that the house was starting to look more like a home. 

He flopped back on his bed, cuddling up under the bedspread and promptly fell asleep. 

* * *

Wade sat at the bar, waiting, impatient. 

The bartender came over with a glass of some clear liquid. “Wade, I swear to god, if you keep shaking the bar with your foot, I’m going to smack you,” Weasel said in his monotone way. 

“I don’t know what else to do, Weasel!” he blurted out, holding his hands out flat on the counter. 

Weasel paused, unused to seeing Wade so frazzled. Wade could be a lot of things but frazzled was not one of them. Truthfully, when he wanted to fuck, he would just fuck someone. Even with the way he looked, he had a very positive reputation when it came to sex. 

“You _accidentally_ played gay porn on your TV?” Weasel asked, leaning on the bar. 

“Yes! If he realized...he didn’t show it!” Wade banged his head on the counter. “Is it too soon? Should I wait?” 

Weasel quirked an eyebrow at the man. “You really like this guy...don’t you?” 

Wade didn’t look up from where he had his forehead pressed against the bar. “He’s...fucking perfect, Weasel,” he finally said, voice muffled. “Cute, gamer, good cook, sweet, passionate, successful...the tightest ass...did I tell you-” 

“He jumped over the fence, yes only like a thousand times, Wade,” Weasel rolled his eyes at the man. “You want to _date_ this guy, Wade. You don’t want to sexit and exit with this one.” 

Wade groaned, lifting up to down the drink. “That seems so complicated,” he winced as the alcohol stung going down. “I haven’t dated since Vanessa.” 

The man behind the bar straightened up when a big man, Hector, came into the room with the assignments. Wade very quickly went into the proper mindset as they called out different jobs that he could pick up. He wanted to keep things light; maybe he could just scare away someone’s mistress or something. He really didn’t want the rough jobs right then. 

“Hit out on scientists at Oscorp!” 

Wade’s eyes widened at that one. “Let me see!” he called out, standing up quickly to grab the paper. He read over it but, like usual, it didn’t say anything about the person or organization who put the hit out. It just listed names and right there, third one down: Peter Parker. “Who put this hit out?” 

The big guy was just the messenger but he shrugged. “Even if I knew, I wouldn’t tell you, Wade,” he grumbled, yelling out the next card. 

Waiting for the crowd to dissipate, he waved the card in Hector’s face. “Listen to me, and listen to me good,” he warned, a little shorter than the man. Hector looked unperturbed but there was a glint in his eyes that showed he knew exactly who he was dealing with. “I’m going to throw this in the garbage because the scientists on this list don’t _deserve_ to be killed. They’re working on life-saving drugs, which, last time I checked, was a _good_ thing.” 

“It’s just a job, Wade,” Hector said while crossing his arms. “If you don’t take the job...someone else will.” 

“We’ll see about that, muchacho,” he said sarcastically, ripping up the card and tossing it into the trash bin. Hector shrugged as he was walking out. Weasel was staring at him oddly, honestly, having never seen him react like that. “His name was on that card.” 

Weasel’s eyes widened in shock. “Shit, really? Why?” 

Clenching his hand into a fist, he shook his head. “It seems like someone doesn’t want them to finish whatever they’re working on,” Wade growled, sending a quick text message to Peter just to see if he would respond. There was a very good possibility that he wouldn’t because he was working tonight but he had to try. 

_What’s the difference between oral and anal sex?_

“I need to find out who put that hit out. As much as I hate Hector and his permanent resting-puta face, he’s right.” 

Weasel clenched his jaw for a second before sighing. “I’ll see what I can find out. If they’re targeting scientists...seems like that should be stopped.” 

Wade leaned over the bar and planted a big kiss on the man’s cheek before he could stop it. “Thanks, Weasel, you’re the best!” 

“Gross, Wade! Never again!” 

The mercenary didn’t hear him as he was rushing out the door to go do his research. He figured he would start with any companies who were in competition with Oscorp. That might be hard because Oscorp was the largest pharmaceutical company in the country. 

He had just sat down in his car and opened his laptop when his phone vibrated. Reaching out, he hardly looked at it while he started typing in the search bar. Once he had clicked on the website, he glanced at his phone. 

_Is this why you were researching gay porn?_

Peter had responded to his dirty joke. It made Wade choke out a dry laugh; if he had any shame, he may have had the decency to blush. As it were...he had no shame whatsoever. 

_Oral makes your day. Anal makes your hole weak!_

He added a peach and eggplant emoji for good measure with a mischievous grin. Focusing back on the task at hand, he knew he had slowed things down for at least a day. That was assuming another organization just like this one hadn’t been roped into it either. He needed to contact some of his buddies in the other organizations just to check. 

His phone vibrated again. It was an eyeroll emoji. 

_I’ve heard foreplay can keep that from happening._

Wade paused when he read the text. He actually had to look away for a moment before glancing back. Was he...was Peter flirting with him? Damn this phone and not being able to see facial expressions and body language! 

_That’s what the research was for! Though, surprisingly, gay porn doesn’t really show that part of it. I’m going to need better resources!_

He quickly hit the send button before he chickened out. There were several other companies that would be interested in taking out some brilliant scientists. Only one of those companies had previous problems with underhanded dealings that included lawsuits about their products not being properly tested. 

Writing down the name of the company, he would need to make some calls. He had several friends who may have dealt with this company in the past. Wade just needed to figure out _who_ in the company was issuing the hits so that he could scare them personally. 

His phone vibrated. 

_You know, they say practice makes perfect._

That text went straight to Wade’s dick, which was not something he wanted while he was researching who was looking to kill the person he was texting. Peter was _definitely_ flirting, right? He wanted to think so but it may be him just...fuck it. He was thinking too hard about this. 

_Oh yeah? I would be a primary resource at that point. Well, I’ll need help with the experiment. You know any professionals I could look to for help?_

Wade wasn’t sure if he were insane or not but that was bold even for him. Who the fuck was he kidding? That wasn’t bold! He usually just asked outright. No, he didn’t just want sex! He wanted...more. He actually thought this guy could be a long term thing. 

His phone vibrated in his hand and he nearly dropped it. 

_You’re in luck, I happen to be a professional scientist. I’ll help under one condition._

Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. 

_Anything. Name it._

Did that sound pathetic and needy? It was too late, he had hit send. Oh fuck. Was this really happening? Was this really happening? 

The next text that popped up on his phone made his heart nearly explode: 

_Take me on a date first._

Wade wasn’t sure if he could contain his heart as it thundered in his chest, filling him with a giddy excitement. He quickly shot back a text. 

_Absolutely. When’s your next day off?_

Oh man. Well, this complicated things a bit, didn’t it? He needed to figure this shit out and quick or the first date he’s scored in a long-ass time was doomed. 

* * *

“See?” Gwen said, tossing Peter the phone. 

The young scientist’s face was the color of an overripe tomato at that point as he read over the texts back and forth. “Gwen, you said you’d help!” Peter nearly squealed, getting knowing looks from the older scientists. 

The blond scoffed as she glanced into a microscope. “I did, I got you a date. How about a _thank you, Gwen_?” 

He looked from the phone to her, conflicted. On the one hand, he was mortified that she had done that without his permission but...on the other hand...a date with Wade? What would that even entail? He had so much fun with the guy already. Did he really want to ruin their bromance with romance? 

That was incredibly cheesy, even for his own head. 

Sighing, he answered the man’s question. He had three days to make sure he didn’t fuck this up or make it awkward. “Thanks, Gwen,” he finally mumbled, going back to his work. He didn’t even need to look at his friend to know she had an insufferable smirk on her face. 

Working was hard when he was thinking about going on a date with Wade. The man’s strong body popped into his mind several times, which made him have to refocus. It was torture. 

Once work was finally over, he made his way back home. The sun was coming up and he was dead tired. He pulled into his garage and smiled when he saw the familiar red sports car coming from the other direction. 

He was headed into the door that connected the garage to the kitchen when his phone went off. It was Wade. 

_Got a second, Petey?_

Odd, the man usually went straight to bed when he got home. Well, that’s what Peter assumed anyways. He quickly shot back a response: 

_Sure, what’s up?_

Was he changing his mind?! 

Peter quickly shook that thought out of his head. There was no way he had changed his mind in a matter of a few hours. Maybe he had forgotten something scheduled on that day? 

He jumped when his phone buzzed in his hand. 

_Meet me out back._

He yawned widely as he walked out his backdoor to see Wade standing at the fence. His arms were leaned against the top of the fence and he had a stupid grin on his face. Even though he looked completely relaxed, Peter couldn’t help but think there was something different about him. He couldn’t put his finger on it but there was a...tension in the man’s face. 

“Hey, work go okay?” Peter found himself asking as he walked over to the fence. 

Wade’s smile didn’t falter. “Boring as shit,” he said with a laugh. It sounded too forced to Peter’s ears. “Hey, listen, a guy I know in the neighborhood just told me there have been some robberies recently. They’re getting pretty close, apparently, so I wanted to make sure you lock your doors and windows.” 

Oh, that explained why the man looked so nervous. 

“I always keep my windows locked,” Peter answered, looking at the fence around his house. “You think they could get in here?” 

The man looked at the back of his house. “I’m going to come over there. Stay put.” 

Peter watched as the man walked around the fence. He did some fiddling with the gate but it was locked and too tall for anyone’s arms to get over and around. Peter walked over and unlocked the gate for him. 

“You’re gate’s good,” Wade said, walking past him. 

The man walked around his backyard, checking windows, the grass, the fence...pretty much everything. Peter couldn’t imagine what it was that he was looking for but didn’t want to stop him. It would make the young man feel immensely better knowing Wade gave his house his seal of approval. 

“I don’t see any footprints or signs that someone’s been scoping out your house, baby boy,” Wade smiled, walking back over to him. “If you hear _anything_ suspicious, you just call my phone and I’ll come over right away, got me?” 

Peter felt his face flush a little at the attention. He wasn’t used to being taken care of ever since he left his Aunt May’s house for college. “Thanks, Wade, I really appreciate you,” he smiled up at the man, watching the man’s eyes widen a bit. “I’d better...get to bed.” 

“Me too. G’night, Petey,” he said as he walked back towards the gate. “Sleep tight!” He was walking backwards, hand raised in the air. “Don’t let the-oof!” Peter couldn’t help but laugh when the man backed right into the gate. “Bed bugs bite!” 

The young man was laughing brightly as he turned to go back into his house. He paused once the door was closed and locked to give a little gleeful squeal, doing a tapdance of joy like a giddy fucking teen. Not only had he not made it awkward...he actually really liked the guy. 

Like... _really_ liked the guy. 

* * *

Wade kept taking the job until the night before Peter’s day off. 

He asked Hector where the card was but the guy just shrugged. “Didn’t get it today.” 

Shit. 

He had known this would happen eventually but it was too good of timing for it not to mean something. Tomorrow would be the only day Peter would be home at night; it would be the perfect time to strike. He was going to need to get set up. 

“If anyone asks, I’m at the strip club fucking around,” Wade told Weasel who rolled his eyes dramatically. 

The rest of the night was spent basically turning the scientist’s house into the one from Home Alone but far more deadly. He also called a few of his buddies to go check out the other two scientists on the list so they could keep an eye out for their houses. He didn’t give a fuck about the other scientists but he definitely knew Peter would be upset if he just let them get killed. 

_Whipped already and ya haven’t even gotten that ass._

“Shut up, Weasel, you’re not even here,” he muttered to himself in irritation as he set up a tripwire attached to his back door. Getting into the young man’s house was terrifyingly easy so he made a quick trip to the hardware store to get some better doorknobs. “This is definitely one of the creepiest things I’ve ever done.” 

Aside from the incident with the whip cream, of course. 

“No wonder the HOA hates me.” 

He jumped a little when his phone started ringing his alarm to warn him when Peter would be headed home. Jumping over the fence, he ducked into the backdoor just as the car pulled into the driveway. He shot a text to Peter. 

_Can you meet me out front?_

Wade made sure to flip his hood up once he stepped outside of his house as the sun was rising and Felicia would be walking her rat-dog soon. He definitely didn’t want to see her look of disgust. She was probably the worst part of the neighborhood. 

He perked up when the young man came out of the garage, holding onto a large, heavy looking box. Wade couldn’t help but think how perfect this was. “Let me get the door for you, Spidey!” he called out, running over to the young man. “Left or right pocket?” 

“Back right,” the young man said with a cute smile. 

Wade would have gotten on his knees to thank whatever god existed but he had a job to do. He slipped his hand down into the young man’s back pocket. The yelp that came out of the boy’s mouth was almost as cute as the red starting to seep across his ears. “Hold on, having a hard time,” Wade smirked, lips right next to his ear. He pressed his hand flat against both the keys and the young man’s perfectly shaped ass. “Deep pockets, damn. Where do you even _find_ pants like these?” 

“W-Wade!” Peter snapped in between his stifled laughter and embarrassed stammering. “They were hanging out of my pocket!” 

Wade gasped, pulling the keychain out before bounding towards the door. “Really? I didn’t notice, sorry!” he grinned, doing a quick switch of the old key with the new while the young man was behind him. He opened the door with a flourish, turning to bow dramatically to Peter. “After you, your majesty!” 

Peter was still perfectly flushed but his laughter was like the call of a damn angel as he walked past. “Thanks for the help...I think.” 

Getting a devious smirk on his face, Wade dangled the keys in the air. “Want me to put them back where I found them? I’d hate to be rude,” he teased a little too far into the boy’s personal space. 

Big brown eyes grew wide in surprise but there was _definitely_ a hint of desire there too. It was enough to make Wade throb in an...inappropriate place. His desire to kiss the young man was suddenly intensely distracting. 

Peter, never breaking eye contact, set the box down on the ground. He was very obviously contemplating what to do; Wade let him. There were a lot of things wrong with this situation. They had literally met a week ago; Wade’s fugly ass appearance; the perfection that was Peter; and definitely the fact that Peter had no idea his house was trapped. 

“I booby-trapped your house,” Wade found himself blurting out. He didn’t give the shocked man a chance to respond before also saying, “I also changed your locks while you weren’t home. Damn it, I’m sorry, can I explain better before you kick my ass out of here?” 

There was a moment of hesitation before Peter let out a breath. “Come on, let’s close the door and sit down. Talk slowly, please. I hardly understand you when you babble like that.” 

They sat down on the couch and Wade explained the whole situation. The young man, to his credit, hid his fear amicably. That didn’t mean the mercenary couldn’t see it but it would have been enough for anyone else. 

“And my co-workers?” he asked just like Wade knew he would. 

“I’ve got some old acquaintances of mine looking after them,” he smiled, grabbing Peter’s hand gently. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you or them, okay, Petey? I’m sorry for going behind your back. I didn’t want to scare you.” 

Peter’s eyes were a kaleidoscope of emotions. “I am scared,” he admitted, squeezing his hand. “But I’m glad you told me. I feel...safer knowing that you’re here to look after me.” 

Oh damn. What was this thing happening to his heart? Was it...oh god he was having a heart attack! “I think I’m going to die,” he muttered out loud, still staring at Peter like a doofus. 

“What?” Peter laughed, sounding both worried and amused. 

“You’re just too cute. I can’t hold it in,” he explained as his hand came up to wrap around the back of his neck. He pulled and, much to his surprise, Peter came willingly. 

The moment their lips met was like fireworks and molten lava all at the same time. A small hand shot up to grab at the front of his shirt but when Wade thought he was going to be pushed away...he was pulled closer. Caught off guard, he found himself on the other end of the hottest kiss of his whole damn life. 

Heat swept across his system as Peter made a small noise of pleasure into the kiss. The young man was the first to pull away for a breath of air. Wade took the opportunity to kiss and nip a line down his neck. The hands twisted in the front of his hoodie were trembling. 

“Are we moving too fast?” Wade found himself asking as he pulled back to get some room. He found himself effortlessly speechless when he saw those big brown bedroom eyes looking up at him through a curtain of thick lashes. His cheeks were flushed all the way to his ears and even down his neck. “Okay, I officially don’t care.” 

Peter chuckled, melting right into his chest just as they both heard a knock on the door. “Fuck,” the scientist whispered, catching Wade a little off guard. He stood up, leaving a very cold spot where he left, and peeked through the peephole. His sigh of frustration was quiet enough for the person on the other side of the door not to hear. “It’s Felicia.” 

Wade couldn’t hold back the cringe that probably scrunched up his face worse than an old ass pug. “Gross, I’ll slip out the backdoor then,” he said, standing up from the couch. He stopped when Peter’s hand shot out to grab onto the sleeve of his hoodie. Wade hesitated, taking the calm moment to smile. “I’ll be back, baby boy. I’m not done kissing the sense out of you yet.” 

Reluctantly, the grip on his shirt loosened enough for him to slip out the back door, careful not to set off the trap that was there. He felt good as he leapt the fence between their houses. He made a quick call to his buddies guarding the other scientists but it seemed that everything had been quiet on their end. 

Wade just had a feeling that tonight was the night. He got a text from Peter right as he was about to head back over to the house. Felicia had stormed off in a huff, which had made the mercenary very happy to see. 

_I’m going to make some dinner. Want some?_

Oh he wanted something alright and it didn’t have anything to do with food. “No, bad,” he snapped at himself. “We haven’t even had a date yet, pervert.” 

_Sounds great, want me to come help?_

“Get those pants off,” he filled in but didn’t type out. He definitely didn’t want to go over there thinking all of that but...damn did he want to see how far they could go. He couldn’t remember a time he had been so excited to fuck someone senseless. 

_Nah, it won’t take long. I’ll bring over some plates._

Oh god, he was coming here. Wade looked around but remembered idly that he hardly lived here between his job and sleep. It looked fine. He quickly cleaned off the table and made sure there was definitely no gay porn this time. It was right about when he was done that he was opening the door. 

Peter had a large plate of tacos on them, which instantly had Wade’s mouth watering. “I figured since it was Tuesday and all,” he said with a bright smile. 

“Just when I thought you couldn’t get any sexier,” Wade mumbled, taking the plate from the scientist. 

There was a distinct flush of color to the young man’s ears as he went over to sit on the couch. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you that flattery will get you nowhere?” he teased with a casual smile. “Now bring that over here.” 

“Oh, how forward of you,” Wade smirked, sauntering over to the couch to set the plate down on the table. “How would you like me?” 

Peter laughed brightly. “I meant the tacos!” 

“Oh, yeah, that makes sense!” he laughed, sitting down. They both shoved a few tacos in their mouths before Wade was able to speak. “So, what did Felicia want?” 

The scowl on the young man’s face made Wade feel much better. “She wanted to remind me to join the HOA. I told her I had decided against it,” he explained nonchalantly. “She was...not happy about it to say the least.” 

“I wish I could have seen her snobby face when you told her,” Wade sighed, leaned back against the couch with a beer. 

Peter hummed and moved quicker than the mercenary could respond. He very quickly found a cute, flushed scientist perched on his lap looking far too happy with himself. “So, I was thinking,” the young man started, running his fingers across the back of Wade’s neck. His hood fell down off of his head, revealing far more than most people ever got to see. Well, unless they were his target. “Maybe I could...stay here and sleep.” 

It was said with a strange mixture of confidence and anxiety. He was putting up a good front, Wade had to give him credit, but he also sounded frightened. “That sounds like a fantastic idea,” Wade smiled, leaning up to catch those pretty lips. They kissed for a few seconds as the mercenary’s large hand trailed down the young man’s spine to his hip. “But you know...we don’t have to do anything other than sleep. I’m not expecting you to perform for your spot on the bed.” 

Peter’s cheeks were the same shade as the car in the garage. “I know, I just...don’t want to be alone.” 

Oh, there it was. 

Wrapping the young man up in his arms, he pulled his head down so they could just cuddle. “It’s okay, Petey, it’s okay to be afraid,” he whispered, stroking a strong hand through his hair gently. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. We can just watch TV and cuddle until you fall asleep.” 

“I’d...like that,” the scientist whispered, sounding so defeated and small. 

He easily stood up with his hands under Peter’s legs to keep him in place. “As much as I would _love_ to smash that ass,” he soothed, peppering kisses across the young man’s neck. “I can wait, Peter.” 

Peter nodded his head against the other man’s shoulder as he was carried bodily up the stairs. They got to a room where Wade set the boy gently to the bed. Peter seemed a little quiet as he stood to take his pants off, leaving only his bright red boxers. They looked like silk and Wade desperately wanted to find out but stopped himself. 

“Do you mind if I take my shirt off too?” the young man asked politely. 

“I would be offended if you didn’t,” Wade pointed out, suddenly realizing how much clothing he still had on. His hesitation was interrupted when the shirt came off of Peter and he got to see all of that perfect, fair skin. “You have abs!” 

He seemed embarrassed by the comment but gently ran fingers down the bumps. “Uh...yeah,” he said, rubbing the back of his head. “There’s an...um, pool at Oscorp that I use before my shift.” 

_Don’t touch the abs...don’t touch the abs…_

Peter, thankfully, couldn’t read minds but sat back lazily on the bed. “So...I showed you mine…” he insinuated with a snarky smirk. His eyes flicked down Wade’s body. 

Wade couldn’t even think about taking off his clothing around such a beautiful and perfect man. “I think...I’ll just sleep in my clothes,” he muttered, looking away. 

He jumped when two gentle hands landed on his shoulders. “Wade,” Peter said so very gently. “I don’t care about the scars.” 

“I do,” he said quickly, grabbing at the young man’s hands that were trying to undo the zipper on his hoodie. “It goes all the way down.” 

Those big brown eyes looked up at him with worlds more understanding that he had gotten in years. “What happened?” he asked, pulling his hands away so that he could grab the zipper again. Wade didn’t have what it took to stop him because...why bother? Peter knew what he was getting into. If he hadn’t balked at Wade’s face...then the rest of him shouldn’t be any different. 

“I was in the military,” he said before controlling the impulse. There was just something about Peter that made him want to tell him everything. Peter was pulling the zipper down to reveal the red shirt underneath. He gently brushed his hands up over Wade’s shoulders to push the jacket down and off of him. “We were captured and...let’s just say there was some acid involved.” 

Peter’s face twisted into a painful expression. “Holy fuck, Wade,” he breathed, running his warm hands up under the hem of the red shirt. “That’s horrifying.” 

Wade huffed out a breathless, humorless chuckle as he focused on the way those hands felt dragging up his sides. It wasn’t until the shirt was tossed aside that the mercenary realized this was the first time anyone had ever seen him shirtless since Vanessa. He felt...raw and exposed. 

Peter didn’t back down though, running his hands across shoulders and down arms until their fingers intertwined. “Wade, I hate to tell you this, man,” the young man started with a devious smile on his face. “But you’re fucking hot...scars and all.” 

Letting out the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding in, Wade pulled the young man closer so he could wrap him up in a tight hug. He buried his face in Peter’s neck, reveling in the feel of someone else’s skin against his own. It had been...years. 

Once they pulled away, Wade smiled down at the young man. “Now my pants.” 

Peter let out a bark of a laugh before smacking the mercenary playfully in the chest. “I think you can manage!” 

They ended up lounging in Wade’s bed, cuddled up together and watching stupid TV dramas for about an hour before Peter fell asleep. Wade wasn’t sure how he had ended up so lucky but as he watched the young man sleep curled up against his side...he felt even more determined to protect him. 

Some time later, he was able to slip out from Peter’s grasp without disturbing him. He needed to check the house just to make sure everything was set and ready to go. He at least had the forethought to write a small note to Peter before leaving. Making it look like he was going for a jog, he scoped out the neighborhood. 

He didn’t see any signs of suspicious activity until he got back around the block. Felicia was out walking...without her rat. What the fuck? She never left the house without her yippy rodent. 

Slowing down, Wade watched her walk up the sidewalk. Once she was at Peter’s gate door, she looked both ways before walking across the road. Okay, now that was suspicious. 

She walked up to the gate and tried the handle. It was obviously locked with a sliding lock on the other side. He quickly ducked down behind a car on the curb across the street and watched from around the bumper. She fiddled with something on the door. It opened like a charm and she seemed content. 

He watched her walk right back to her house, knowing full well that no one would be paying attention to her because it was dinner time. It was starting to seem like Wade’s instincts were right after all. It just seemed too good to be true that Felicia would be the one to get her ass kicked. 

Two birds with one stone and all that. 

Wade waited for about five minutes before walking around the other side of his house to his back neighbor. They were on pretty good terms just because he let them eat the fruit off of his trees whenever they wanted. He cut through their backyard and jumped the fence. 

Carefully, like the wolf setting a trap for little red, he crept into Peter’s house and up into his room. He crawled into the bed that smelt far too good and waited. She had no idea he was there and it was going to be so great to see the look on her face. 

It was right around midnight that he heard the first trap go off at the backdoor. The distinctive clang of a pot that had been full of some acid he had found on some job a few months ago. It hurt like a bitch, he would know. The obvious lack of scream though was a little daunting. Maybe the mercenary had dodged it? It was definitely likely though they obviously hadn’t seen the trap or they would have kept it from making such a loud sound. 

They would be rushed now, however, worried that their target had been alerted by the sound. They would make more mistakes, which is exactly what Wade wanted them to do. Next was the tripwire attached to a big rock on the top of the cabinets. 

The loud _crash_ of the rock hitting the ground was enough to make him giggle to himself. Still no screaming, which impressed Wade. Had she managed to dodge that one as well? 

Now she would be desperate, however, which meant that she _definitely_ wasn’t going to pay attention to the plastic wrap right at eye level at the top of the stairs and- 

“Fuckin’ hell!” 

_Thump, thump, thump, thump._

All the way down the fucking stairs, just like he planned. He quickly jumped out of bed, figuring, obviously she was going to run if she could. He made it to the plastic wrap, ducked and practically skipped down the stairs. She was lying in a heap at the bottom. 

“Well, well,” he said as he stopped beside her. “If it isn’t Felicia the VP of the HOA. Why in the _world_ would you be here in Peter’s house, skulking around...setting off my traps like a bad rendition of Home Alone?” 

She glared at him from her spot on the floor. He could see from the moonlight filtering through the window that she possibly had a broken arm. He wasn’t sure they were supposed to bend that way. “I should have known,” she groaned, holding her bent arm. “The fuck are you doing here, Wade?” 

He leans over her with his hands on his hips, tilting his head curiously. “Now, now, don’t be like that,” he tutted, mocking her when she talked to his neighbors when their shrubs are .5 centimeters too high. “Just tell me who hired you and I’ll call an ambulance to take you to the hospital.” 

Her scoff was just as dismissive as it was pretentious. “You know how this works Wade,” she said, nearly spitting out his name like it was poison. “I get a card with the names and finish the job. It just so happened that this one was close to home.” 

She was lying, he could tell. “Oh, you poor sweet dear,” he said with mock care. He stepped over the woman’s body and sat down on her pelvis heavily, straddling her. “I happen to know for a fact-” he reached out to press down on her broken arm lightly. She hissed in pain but couldn’t move away. “-that they _tried_ that route. _I_ took the card until it disappeared, which means that they hired someone personally. Now, tell me who you work for or-” he squeezed her arm until she yelped in pain. “-so help me god I’ll kill you pro-bono.” 

There was a moment where she held back but once he started twisting her arm...it came out. “Scinet-fuck!-Scinet hired me!” she screamed desperately. 

He recognized the name of the company from the list of rivals that he had come up with a few days ago. It was the biggest rival of Oscorp, by far, and had everything to gain from three genius scientists being killed. Now he had to figure out a way to get them to stop. 

“Good girl, now,” he said, standing up in one quick motion. The woman flopped back against the ground, boneless and panting. “You’re going to testify in court to that, you hear?” 

Her eyes widened in both shock and fear. “What-no! I can’t do that, Wade! They’ll kill me! My career will be over!” 

He wasn’t listening as he tied her feet together with a zip tie. Next, he grabbed out his phone and hit the speed dial for his all time favorite police officer. Well, that wasn’t fair...he was the _only_ police officer that Wade liked. He couldn’t help it...that jawline! 

“Wade, what kind of trouble are you into now?” the man’s smooth, sweet voice said over the phone. He wasn’t angry, no, he actually sounded a little amused by Wade. 

“Captain Rogers, I am offended!” he said brightly, placing a hand on his chest as if the man could see. “I’ll have you know I’m calling you to invite you over for tea!” 

The man’s laugh was small but so worth it. “Sure, _tea_ , what can I help you with?” 

“Well, I kind of caught a mercenary trying to kill my neighbor. She was hired by Scinet and I need to keep her alive,” he said as if it were no big deal. 

Based on the sounds of chaos over the phone, it was _definitely_ a big deal. “Text me the address, Wade. I’m on my way.” 

He did as he was told while humming an old ‘80’s song to himself. It was about the time that he was hitting send that his phone went off. “Hey, Barnes, what’s up?” he asked, tucking the phone between his ear and shoulder. 

“Got the guy,” the gruff man said without preamble. “What do you want me to do with him?” 

“Tie ‘im up and I’ll send someone your way for retrieval,” Wade smirked, grabbing the woman by the front of the shirt and dragging her through the house. “Maybe you’ll get to meet Captain Rogers, dude is stacked, you should wrestle him!” 

There was obvious silence on the other end of the phone where he could practically _hear_ the man roll his eyes. “Wade, seriously, dude, stop trying to hook me up with burly men,” he said, there was a smirk in his tone behind the grumpiness. 

“But that’s your-” he grunted as he hauled the woman down the stairs and onto the sidewalk. “-type. I’ll call you back BB.” 

He quickly sent Rogers a message to let him know about the second and third mercenaries because he assumed Clint was done as well. The next two hours were a whirlwind of activity as Roger’s men came by to pick up the woman. He got in trouble for not mentioning her arm was broken (whoops) and once everything was said and done only then he was able to go back to his house. 

Peter was, obviously, awake from all of the commotion. “What happened?” he asked as soon as Wade walked through the door. He was still in his boxers, looking quite delectable even through his frantic nerves. “Are you okay?” 

Wade grabbed the hands that touched his chest and brought them up to his lips. “I’m fine, baby boy,” he whispered, glad that he was safe and sound. “It’s being taken care of by a beautiful, blond police officer.” 

The brown eyes were confused for a few seconds by the statement but melted into relief. “Thank you, Wade, I don’t...I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t here,” he whispered, looking like there might be tears in the corner of his eyes. It made his already-big eyes even bigger. 

“Damn it, you’re too cute,” Wade muttered, pulling the young man forward to ravage him. Heat raced through his system when the hands at his chest clenched in his shirt. “Now sex? Please. I need it.” 

“Don’t pout, it’s not sexy!” Peter laughed, tugging Wade backwards towards the stairs by his shirt. 

They made their way towards the bedroom, pausing a few times so Wade could shove the scientist against walls for heavy kissing. By the time they got to the bedroom, Wade had lost his shirt and both men were pitching tents. Peter’s boxers were gone as soon as they stepped into the room. 

The mercenary’s eyes were drawn to his beautiful ass while he lost his own pants and underwear. He was so focused on Peter that he forgot to be ashamed of his scarring, which he would remember later but for now… 

“You top or bottom?” Wade asked, going for the lube he had stashed in his bedside table. 

Peter looked at him from where he was lying on the bed. “I...have a choice?” he questioned, obviously shocked. 

Wade grabbed a condom as well before looking over at the smaller man. “I mean, you _look_ like a bottom but that doesn’t mean you _have_ to be,” he shrugged, cuddling up between the long, lean legs. “Tell me what you _want_. Take or give?” 

Brown eyes rapidly blinked a couple of times before he looked down at the erection jutting out from Wade’s body. “Take first, give later,” he said, breathless. “I want that inside me, now.” 

Wade’s dick twitched at the sound of Peter’s voice. “Hell yeah,” he nodded, grabbing the lube to coat his fingers. He went to his knees on the ground, pulling the young man by his legs to the edge of the bed. “Tell me if I hurt you.” 

His worry melted away once he pressed the first finger into the young man. The sound he made was...fucking heaven. That lean body completely relaxed against the bed as if this were his favorite thing to be doing. 

Wade suddenly worried that he wouldn’t last long enough to fuck the guy if he kept making those sounds of wanton need. “M-More, Wade, please,” Peter begged, sending another spike of pleasure through the mercenary. 

“Fuck, baby boy,” he moaned, pressing another finger into him. He watched with rapt attention as the young man’s back arched off of the bed accompanying his moan of pleasure. “You’re so hot. God I can’t handle how hot you are.” 

“W-Wade, please,” he stammered, needy and pressing himself down around the fingers. “F-Fuck me.” 

Didn’t need to tell Wade twice. He quickly slipped on the condom, lubed up and got into position. His hands wrapped around the thin ankles, holding the young man’s legs in a scandalous V as he pressed forward. 

Wade was fucking infacuated with the young man’s reaction. Most would tense up at the intrusion but Peter practically melted into the feel. The pale pink color of his cheeks had slipped down to his neck and chest, which had Wade’s eyes drawn to his hard nipples and then further to the twitching erection against the planes of his abs. 

Peter’s hands were grasping at the blankets above his head, eyes squeezed closed. “Damn it, baby boy,” Wade muttered, captivated. “You’re far too sexy like this.” 

Brown eyes opened slowly to look up at him, half-lidded and definitely full of lust. “P-Please, Wade, move,” he whispered, voice trembling. 

Shit, he wasn’t even all the way inside the young man. Who was he to refuse such a sweet request, though? So, he started giving shallow thrusts that pushed him further and further into the boy’s hot, tight body until he was completely sheathed. The sweet hiccup of a sound that escaped Peter egged him on as he started giving hard, deep thrusts. 

“W-Wade-fuck!” he gasped, eyes widening in shock. 

The mercenary aimed for that spot again, shifting the grip on the young man’s ankles down to his strong thighs. He was quite flexible as Wade pressed his legs down and met no resistance. “Oh fuck,” Wade grunted when Peter’s petite hands grabbed his own legs behind his knees. “Keep doing shit like that am I’m _never_ going to last very long.” 

Wade was going to think about something gross to keep himself from being a five-minute-man but when his eyes glanced down...he couldn’t. Peter had his arms wrapped around his thighs, eyes squeezed closed and his dick was disappearing into his beautiful body-fuck it. He was just going to have to make up for length of time with quantity because he wasn’t planning on letting Peter leave this bed until he had to go back to work. 

He was able to thrust a few more times before slamming himself home and pausing to allow his body to shudder as he came. “Fucking hell, Peter, sorry, you-” he muttered incoherently. “Didn’t come yet.” 

Peter was a little flustered but shook his head. “Switch with me.” 

Truth be told, Wade hadn’t bottomed in a while but as soon as the command left the young man’s lips...he wanted to. He pulled out, disposed of the condom and flopped down onto his stomach. “Oh yeah, top me you beautiful gymnast!” he teased, looking over his shoulder with a devious smirk. 

Peter rolled his eyes but was in the process of grabbing the lube and a condom. “I’m not a gymnast,” he laughed, coming over to straddle the back of Wade’s legs. 

“I’ll remind you of the time you used our fence as a hurdle,” he pointed out, feeling the tingle of anticipation as he heard the snick of the lube bottle’s lid. He gave a small gasp when a finger circled his hole teasingly. Commanding his body to relax, he felt the thin digit easily slide into him without much resistance. “And you just let me-ah!-bend you in half.” 

Peter fucked into him carefully with that one finger, leaning over Wade to kiss his shoulder. “I was a runner for track in high school and college,” he explained, gently working another finger into Wade. The mercenary, to his credit, was feeling pretty good at this point so the stretch was only a mild inconvenience. 

“T-That explains it-fuck!” he gasps once the fingers brush past his prostate. It sent a shiver of goosebumps across his body, which Peter noticed and started attacking the spot with good accuracy for someone who wasn’t used to topping. “Oh shit, baby boy, yeah.” 

Once another finger was worked in, the fingers completely disappeared, much to the disappointment of Wade who had actually been enjoying the attention. It wasn’t often _he_ got finger fucked. Maybe they would make this a normal occurrence-fuck yeah that was a great idea! He was so distracted that his thoughts didn’t come back to reality until he felt the blunt tip of the man’s erection brushing his hole. 

“You okay, Wade? You got quiet,” Peter asked, laying kisses across the mercenary’s shoulders and neck. That was nice. Not many people paid attention to him like that. 

“Yeah, I’m good, baby boy, now, fuck me like you mean it!” he smirked, resting his forehead against the bed. 

The slick glide of the scientist’s dick was fucking _heaven_. Part of the reason he prefered to top was because not many people gave him the preparation he needed to be ready. Peter, fucking sexual fantasy that he was, had prepared him so well that the intrusion just felt amazing instead of painful or uncomfortable. 

“Oh fuck yeah,” Wade moaned, clenching his hands into the bedsheet. “Keep treating me like this and you might just be top forever.” 

There was a huffed laugh from the young man as he shifted his position a bit. He ended up straddling Wade’s thighs, hands fondling his ass roughly. “God, Wade, you’re so fucking hot,” Peter breathed. The words made Wade’s skin tingle and his chest tighten. It had been a _long_ time since someone had some shit like that. 

Peter rocked his hips to test the waters. It sent a shot of liquid hot pleasure through Wade’s system as, it seemed, Peter’s dick was the perfect length to brush right against his prostate. His own cock was squished between his stomach and the bed but definitely hard and ready. 

With a quick jerk of his narrow hips, Peter started a hard, fast rhythm that had the mercenary seeing stars almost immediately. For someone so thin, Peter had some power behind that body as he pistoned in and out of Wade. His cock in this position perfectly scraped right across Wade’s sweet spot, which had the man making all sorts of noises. 

“F-Fuck, Petey, yeah-oh fuck!” Wade pushed back as much as he could against the thrusts but Peter’s hands were firmly planned against the small of his back. He had nowhere to go except to just lie there and take it. Fuck, he was good with that if Peter kept up that pace. 

“Shit, not gonna last either,” the scientist grit out without breaking his rhythm. “Lift up.” 

Wade had at least enough coherency to get to his knees, face still pressed into the bed because-damn it-his arms were fucking shaking. This, at least, gave him a little bit more leverage to push back against the young man’s dick. It wasn’t until Peter’s petite hand wrapped around his weeping dick that he realized _why_ they had changed position. 

“You gonna cum with my dick up your ass, Wade?” the man whispered in the filthiest of tones, punctuating it with a sharp nip to his shoulder. 

Oh. OH. Shit. Unexpected but fucking hot. 

“Oh god,” he groaned, mind wrecked with how fucking hot it was to hear the young man talk like that. “Yeah, fuck-fuck me, Petey-fuck me until I cum.” 

There was so much going on at that moment. Wade got lost in the sound of skin slapping against skin, the feel of a very firm grip jerking him off and the hard dick brushing his prostate with every hard thrust. It didn’t take long before he moaned as cum splashed across the bed spread. 

“Fuck,” Peter grunted as the walls wrapped around his dick clenched. 

They stayed still for a few moments like that until Peter pulled out, at which point, Wade rolled over onto his back so he wouldn’t be in the wet spot. He was vaguely aware of Peter walking around but was content to bask for a moment. It wasn’t until the young man was sidling up to Wade’s side, cuddling close, that he came back to reality. 

“Good?” the scientist asked, wrapping an arm around Wade’s waist. 

“Oh yeah,” Wade nodded, kissing the young man’s head gently. “I could definitely get used to that kind of attention.” 

Peter hummed happily in response. There was a comfortable silence for a few minutes until Peter decided to break it. “So, what happens next? Am I going to have to testify or something like that?” he asked, sounding very nervous. 

“Not really sure, to be honest,” Wade shrugged. “I’ll call up Captain Blond tomorrow and see what the next steps are. Either way, we’ve got three mercenaries trying to take out three innocent scientists for a rival company; it’s a pretty cut and dry court case. Well, if they weren’t being represented by one of the largest companies next to Oscorp.” 

Sitting up, Peter looked at him with a skeptical look. “You’re not making me feel better, you know that right?” he asked, breaking the illusion of sterness with a soft chuckle. 

Wade got up from the bed to take the comforter off. “It’s not really my thing to comfort people, Petey. I’m just being honest with you,” he shrugged, kissing the young man before taking the comforter to the laundry room. He stopped at the door. “I’ll be with you the whole way through, okay? You won’t be alone.” 

Peter’s face lit up with a bright smile that could fuel the whole neighborhood’s electricity for weeks. “Now, _that_ makes me feel better!” he laughed, flopping back down onto the bed casually. “Hurry up so we can keep going, hero-man.” 

“Aye-aye, captain!” Wade said brightly before running to dispose of the comforter. 

**Author's Note:**

> [Spideypool Bingo Card](https://mutants-and-soldiers.tumblr.com/post/622264254491394048/my-bingo-card-for-spideypool-bingo-2020-ive)
> 
> Special thanks to Cole Patrick on Unsplash for the photo.


End file.
